Bug Buzz 1: The Grasshopper

Mighty Bookworm interviews a gaudy grasshopper on this humorous talk show for and about bugs.

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Transcript

MUSIC: Bug Buzz theme music

SCENE 1: An insect bandleader, Calloway Cricket, is standing upright while playing the keyboard and conducting the Bug Buzz Band behind him (he has his back to the band) as they play the “Bug Buzz” theme music. The band is on the left side of the screen. Cricket Calloway is green. He is dressed in a wild purple suit with yellow tie and is wearing sunglasses.

The band members are sitting. The band is made up of black, brown and green crickets who also are dressed like people. One is playing drums, two are playing trumpets, one is playing a trombone, and one is playing a saxophone.

To the left of the band (facing us) sits Mighty Bookworm. He should be drawn just as he looks on our website, and not wearing people clothes. He is sitting behind a desk. On the right side of his desk is a large easy chair where his guests will sit (the chair is between the band and the desk). A glittery sign on the wall behind Bookworm reads “Bug Buzz”.

As the scene opens, the band is playing the theme song. Then pan over to show Mighty Bookworm sitting behind his desk. To his right is an easy chair. The worm is snapping his fingers to the music and then points to the band to signal them to stop playing the song. NOTE: Please draw the the worms’s eyes, mouth, head and hands so they can move as he speaks.

SCENE 2: The worm is seated behind the desk talking directly to us.

WORM: (like Jay Leno or Johnny Carson) Our next guest might very well be the high jump champion of the insect world. He can jump more than 20 times his own height. Let’s hear it for Gaudy Grasshopper!

SCENE 3: The grasshopper hops in. The grasshopper is bright red-orange and blue.

SFX: Studio audience applause.

SCENE 4: Front view of the grasshopper sitting in the easy chair to the right of the Bookworm (as he faces us). The Worm starts to speak to the grasshopper.

WORM: Welcome to Bug Buzz.

HOPPER: (with a slight Australian accent) Thank you for invitin’ me. I was having such a great time in the green room, I almost didn’t want to come out here. That’s quite a repast you laid out in there.

(The Bookworm does a double take as though he is confused.)

WORM: What Green Room? What repast?

HOPPER: That big room back there with all the flowers. How’d you know I like geraniums? I’m full as a tick.

WORM: Oh my gosh!!! Those were the flowers for Martha Stewart’s flower show. I can’t believe this! (then, a chuckle)

SFX: Medium crowd laughter (file 61081)

HOPPER: That lady does have good taste. (Burp!)

SFX: Medium crowd laughter (file 60831)

WORM: (Chuckle) Okay, we’ll worry about Martha’s flowers later. The audience wants to hear about you.

HOPPER: Well, I come from a very big family. There are more than 18,000 different types of grasshoppers.

WORM: I’ll bet there aren’t too many orange and blue grasshoppers.

HOPPER: (proudly) You got that right! Most grasshoppers are green or brown. I’m all orange and blue, as you can see.

WORM: Bright orange and blue!! Is that why they call you gaudy?

HOPPER: I hate being called that.

WORM: What?

HOPPER: Gaudy. That implies something tacky and tasteless. One thing I’m not is tasteless.

WORM: How’s that?

HOPPER: I taste very bad. Literally. That discourages predators from wanting to have me for lunch.

WORM: So you don’t have bad taste, you just taste bad?

HOPPER: Yes, I taste awful.

WORM: (to the camera) Did you hear that birds and reptiles – even you other bugs that feed on insects? The Gaudy Grasshopper tastes horrible. So go find something else for dinner. But no caterpillars!!!

SFX: Medium crowd laughter (file 61068)

WORM: (to grasshopper) Hey, it’s been fun. Thanks for joining us on Bug Buzz.

(back to camera) Till next time, this is Mighty Bookworm and the Bug Buzz Band saying, “If you want to know what’s happening with bugs, you’ll get it here at the buzzzzzzz.”

SFX: Studio audience applause

REPEAT SCENE 1: The bug conductor is leading the band as they play the theme song.

MUSIC: Bug Buzz theme song. Start at 4:42 of Swing Cat and play out to finish

Roll closing credits over the picture of the orchestra playing.